Tuesday was my first OB appointment. Steve and I were both so excited to meet our little bean on the ultrasound. I left work early, and went to the doctor's office. After the prerequisite peeing in a cup, and some basic medical history, followed by about an hour's wait, we were ushered into the ultrasound room. The technician came in, and started up the machine. After several long minutes, she got a "something's wrong" look on her face, and left to get the doctor. The doctor came in, looked at the machine, and moved the wand some more. The sac was showing, but no baby. The doctor explained that either I could be less far along as they thought, or I could have a condition called a blighted ovum. She sent me to the hospital for blood work to check my hcg levels, with additional orders to return today for a re-check of hcg levels. Today, the blood work confirmed that my hcg levels are dropping, and a second ultrasound revealed that the sac had already begun to collapse.
The doctor spewed some trite phrase about how I'm still young, that it wasn't even a "real" baby yet, and that I can try again. None of that helps at all. I KNOW my age, that I can still try, and yes, it was a real baby, thank you very much. I really wanted to punch him. His bedside manner is severely lacking.
So now I'm sitting at home, bawling my eyes out, and waiting.
Thank you, readers, for your prayers.
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